Category: Suffering

In The Pain, God Is There

A reflection on how I’ve experienced God meeting with me, inspired by Elijah’s experience with God in 1 Kings 19:8-18.

I feel alone sometimes.

At times it feels like wandering.

Other times it feels like running for my life.

On the outside I can accomplish something big for God. People see it. God shows up. It proves my faith. Right?

Except on the inside I’m still not sure where He is when the big thing is over. Will I still be alone? Wandering? Running for my life?

And so I hide. From others. But mostly from God.

But then He comes and invites me to meet with Him.

And so I go to meet Him where I think He will be: in the big church event. The band. The choir. The singing. The preaching. The altar. It’s the place where people come to meet with God. Right?

But that’s not where He wants to meet with me.

And so I go to meet Him where I think He might be next: in the conference, the concert, the retreat. All the people. The unique setting. The exciting or heavy emotions. This is where big things happen in my life for God. Right?

But that’s not where He wants to meet with me.

And so I go to meet Him where He’s surely got to be: in the mission trip, the outreach, the doing. That’s where people need me. That’s where important things are accomplished. This is where God wants to work in big ways thru me. Right?

But that’s not where He wants to meet with me.

And so I’m unsure where He wants to meet with me.

Then the pain comes: death, sickness, loss, broken relationship, anger, anxiety, confusion, loneliness.

And in the pain. A voice. His voice. Quietly speaking:

You

are

not

alone,

I AM

here.

So this is where He wants to meet with me.

This is where He wants to speak to me.

This is where He wants to tune my heart to His.

In the stillness of my pain.

I was so busy looking to meet with Him in all the places I was told He would be. All the places I knew He should be. All the places outside of my pain.

But He was waiting. To meet with me. Right where I was. Right in the midst of my life. Right in the middle of my pain.

But He was waiting. To meet with me. Right where I was. Right in the midst of my life. Right in the middle of my pain.

Commentary:

I am not saying God has not “shown up” in my life, or doesn’t show up in people’s lives, at things like church events and retreats. I’m saying I never understood what truly being with God (and more accurate what God truly being with me) was like until I finally experienced Him meeting me right where I was at. It has been my experience that many of us go looking for God “out there,” instead of experiencing Him being with us “here” – right where we are.

I spent so much of my young adult life “looking for God in all the wrong places” (if I can play off a popular music lyric). I’m not sure it was taught to me more than caught. But I had grown up believing God was out there somewhere. In the religious experiences. In the displays of worship. Even in the miracles or on the “mission field.” I would have never said such a thing theologically. But practically it’s how I lived.

And then something shifted. Years ago really. But this COVID season has solidified it in a way that is actually changing my life.

It’s the very truth of the incarnation: He is not out there. He is right here.

With me. With us. Right where we are.

In our homes. In our workplaces. In our schools.

In the store. In the hospital. In the counseling session.

In our playing sports. In our vacations. In our gathering with friends.

And once I found Him here with me, it didn’t change the pain. The pain was still there. But I didn’t feel alone in the pain anymore. And I didn’t run from the pain anymore. Because God met with me in the pain.

You are not alone. God is with you.

He wants to meet with you in the pain.

The Dark Night Rises In Colorado

If anyone needed a reminder of the reality of suffering and sin, we have seen another example this morning in the early hours of The Dark Knight Rises premier. Reports are still being clarified, but the alleged suspect arrived and threw a tear gas like gas in the theater and then proceed to fire an unknown number of weapons and rounds of ammunition. As of this writing twelve are reported dead and over forty injured in a variety of ways. As many may be asking at this point in the day, “What was the point?”

The sad truth is that there may never be an answer that will satisfy those of us that are wondering. There will never be an answer that will ease the pain of the loss of life. Events like this occur far too often, but it is not until a sensational event takes place, like the one this morning that our attentions are sharply drawn. I am frustrated by this. I am angry that this has happened again. But, some of my frustration and some of my anger is pointed at a culture that insists that it understands the deepest longings of the human heart, mind and soul. We have become so enlightened that we are more ignorant and more perverse than ever before.

I find it somewhat ironic that James Holmes, the suspect that was arrested, was released from the University of Colorado where he was a PH.D. student in neuroscience.

While I was finishing my undergraduate degree, I had to read The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera. It is an interesting tale of a man by the name of Tomáš. His defining characteristic is that he has an insatiable sexual appetite. And yet, he never seems to find any peace or satisfaction. Instead of finding a weightiness to his existence, Tomáš realizes that his being is unbearable light. There is no substance, no significance, nothing of value or worth to his life. As you read the book you find that it is not in the abundance of pleasure that you find meaning. This is the strange existential reality of life. While many of us who heard about this terrible event feel sorrow and mourn with those that have lost; and while we feel a righteous anger toward the one who committed these heinous acts, we eventually all turn our attentions inward.

We turn inward because we think about what we would have done if we had been there. We turn inward wondering how we would feel if we had been injured, known someone who died or second guessed our decision to get out without helping others. We turn inward because we all are faced with the undying and unrelenting question, “Am I doing anything with my life worth remembering?” This is a fundamental reality.

If we were honest with ourselves we would have to acknowledge the general self-centeredness of our lives. I hate to even admit it, but it is true. We more often than not are looking out for “good ole #1.” What do we have in our lives that helps us to counteract this? The only example we have is Jesus’ self-less love for sinners. Jesus died for those that deserved it least. We are the reason for his death and suffering and he is the reason for our life and joy.

Paul says it this way in Philippians 2:

5 Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, 6 who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, 7 but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. 9 Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (NKJV)

The mind of Christ, as Paul calls it describes the change that takes place within those who follow Jesus. This change affects everything that we do, especially how we see and respond to tragedies like the one that occurred this morning. I do not make any claims in knowing how Jesus would respond to this event. I do think that it would include sorrow, weeping and a desire to serve those affected.

A dark night rose last night. It just was not the one that everyone was looking forward to.

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A Tribute to Jay Williams | “He Loved Jesus”

Jay Williams

(July 11, 1980 – June 30, 2012)

A Tragic End

Around 4:45 pm this afternoon Jay Williams died from injuries suffered from falling off a roof while at work, eleven days shy of his thirty-second birthday. That may have been the cause of my friend’s death. But, that will never be what I remember most about him.

It is during events like this that we are confronted with some of the most difficult questions of faith. We are consumed with our sorrow and pain. We are riddled with questions that may never be answered. We are shocked into the unchanging reality that the one who died, we will not see again… this side of eternity. And here in lies the hope of the disciple of Jesus. We do not mourn like those who have no hope, Paul told the Thessalonians (1 Thessalonians 4:13).

God never promised that our lives on earth would be long and filled with every pleasure we could fill it with. What he promised was that we would never have to go through anything by ourselves. Taking advantage of all of the wonders and opportunities of life will never be a sin. We just can not expect those things to fill our hearts and satisfy out deepest longings. I never knew what that meant until I met Jay Williams. He taught me how to see the good in every situation and how to fill as many moments as possible with all that you have to offer.

I was praying for a different outcome. I wanted to see Jay again. I want Jay to be at the Chrysalis Journey Weekend in five weeks talking about serving God and helping others see their own potential. That’s what I want, but that is not the truth. Jay has walked THROUGH death’s door. That is what death is. It is a door we have to go through because Jesus has not come back and shut it for good. And, until Jesus comes back and makes everything right again we will have to deal with tragedies and losses like this.

But, do you know what I hate more than the fact that I will not see Jay again until I die or Jesus comes back? I hate the crazy things that people will say to try and make his family feel better. I want to clear some things up right here.

  • God did not need another angel. He has all the angels he needs.
  • It was not Jay’s time. Jay had an accident because that is what happens in a fallen world, and that accident cost him his life.
  • Jay is not looking over us. Jay is looking into the eyes of his Savior and is enjoying the fulfillment of Jesus’ promise to him. Jay is better than he has ever been.
  • Jay would not choose to come back. This is the hardest of all. If Jay would choose anything, it would be for all of us who love him to be with him, where he is with Jesus.

I do not say any of this to hurt, but to remind us all of what, I believe, Jay would want us to remember. Our loss and grief is great because we loved him and we will miss him. But, if we see death as the end of everything rather than as the passage to everything we will deny ourselves the peace of knowing that he truly is in a better place.

The Life and Legacy of Jay Williams

There are three things that characterize Jay to me. I found all of these characteristics to be true as I worked with Jay during Chrysalis this past year.

1. He loved Jesus.

Man, did he love Jesus. He was not willing to lose sight of him. In everything that he did and said, Jay wanted to help others understand what he had come to know and love about Jesus.

Jay was not a religious person, but he had an undeniable faith. He was not trying to impress anybody, and yet, we were all impressed with him. His faith was rich and deep and true. He did everything he could to let you know that you were a child of God without making you feel like there was something wrong with you if you were not yet one. Jesus defined who he wanted to be.

I have to say that Jay was one of the most Christ-like men I have ever met.

2. Because he loved Jesus, He loved others.

In the time that I knew Jay (which was not long enough), he never met a stranger. He may have found you strange, but that never stopped him from talking with you and engaging you in conversation. I may have been the only one he did this to, but he had an awful tendency of not looking me in the eyes when we talked. I know he was not intimidated, I do not think Jay was scared of anything. I guess he was just a humble guy and did not want to make anybody else feel uncomfortable.

It always amazed me how he could talk people into doing or trying things they would not have done on their own. I remember him tying a tight-rope thing to a tree and the back of a truck and trying to teach a few people how to get on and off without hurting themselves. That was just his way. He did not believe that people could not do things. They just needed somebody to believe in them. So, there was Jay ready to believe. He believed in others because Jesus believed in him.

3. Because he loved others, he tried to help others see Jesus.

Everything Jay did and everything he was gave Jay an opportunity to be a light for Jesus. Jay was not a preacher or an evangelist, but everything he did reflected his faith in Jesus. That is what he wanted most of all, for people to know the one who had changed his life.

I do not expect any words of mine to capture all that Jay was. I just hope to remind myself of all that Jay was to me and how I am a better man having known him.

I will miss you my friend, but the wait will not be long. I will see you soon enough.

Worshiping God when suffering IS a part of His plan.

I was reading this morning in 1 Peter and came across these two verses.

“For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil.” (1 Peter 3:17, ESV)

“Therefore let those who suffer according to God’s will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good.” (1 Peter 4:19, ESV)

Peter seems to imply that there my be times when suffering IS included in God’s plan for us. Not only does this sound wrong, there are many within the Christian community that teach and believe that this would never happen. But, they do this in contradiction to what the Bible plainly says. This is an inconvenient truth. We have to deal with the reality of what God says in His word, rather than trying to make it say something that it does not.

While there may be times in our lives were we live in fear that suffering may come into our lives, we should remember that God is fully aware of all that is taking place around us. There is nothing that escapes God’s observing eyes. If we believe in God’s love; if we believe in God’s grace; if we believe that God will work all things out for our good, then we have be careful not to make every experience of suffering into a time to complain and gripe and doubt God’s plan. If and when we suffer, we must make sure that we suffer justly. The fact that we do not suffer more is the true miracle if God’s love.

The question that took shape this afternoon was this:

Can I worship God if the suffering I
endure IS because of something in God’s plan which
God has chosen not to reveal to me?

When we think about what is happening around us it can be so easy to lose sight of the greatness and grandness of God. But, suffering has a way of adjusting our focus. If suffering happens outside of God’s will then we have no reason to fear. God will see us through. So, what do we do when we are confronted with the possibility, and according the Peter, the actuality that suffering is a part of God’s plans? Will we retreat from what the Bible says, or will we allow God to shape our view of the world? Because suffering has such a powerful effect on us, we are confronted with the varied array of assumptions that we may have made about how God works in the world. Assumptions that must be changed if we are going to live in obedience to God and His Word.

The challenge that Peter sets before us is this: when we find ourselves suffering from the concussion that suffering inflicts on our lives and heart, will we be able to “entrust their souls to a faithful Creator?” A faithful Creator. God’s faithfulness toward us should never be called into question. As pilgrims on the journey of faith, we need to trust that God’s view of the events and circumstances of history are controlled and guarded against sabotage by His sovereign reign.

I came across this song some months ago and I found that it captures, in a powerful way, what Peter is communicating here in his letter.

You can hear Laura Story tell the story behind the song here.

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Only Jesus Can Make Sense of Disease and Pain

I came across this video of Kari Jobe singing “Healer” to a young girl who, from the video, is obviously suffering from something. I don’t know what it is. I don’t need to know. What I know is that only Jesus can make sense of this.

Healer - Jada and Kari

There are many reasons, now after 13 years of dedicated service to Jesus, that I believe that Jesus and the faith that he calls us to is the one true faith available to all mankind. Christianity is the only religion that calls us to accept and trust the dying and humiliated prophet INTO death as the means of passing through from this expression of life to the next.

Probably the most remarkable conversion story related in the bible is found in Luke 23. Why do I say this? I say it because the man that “accepted” Jesus couldn’t have made a bigger mistake. It had to have been the most irrational decision he could have made. Look at it for yourself.

39One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!” 40But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? 41And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” 42And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” 43And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.” (Luke 23:39-43, ESV)

Where was the man when he placed his faith in Jesus? He was on the cross right next to Jesus’ cross. The image that must have been before him was not an inspiring one. As graphic as Mel Gibson’s The Passion of the Christ was, it did no justice to the reality that the robber witnessed. The idealized images of Jesus are not what converted this man. It wasn’t even the hope of resurrection that motivated the wish of redemption (it could hardly be categorized as hope).

This is the same criminal who earlier had joined in with the crowd to make fun and mock Jesus!

44And the robbers who were crucified with him also reviled him in the same way. (Matthew 27:44, ESV)

I am getting to place where I am running out of clever arguments for why someone should believe in Jesus or that God exists. I am starting to understand why the cross is foolishness to some.

20Where is the one who is wise? Where is the scribe? Where is the debater of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? 21For since, in the wisdom of God, the world did not know God through wisdom, it pleased God through the folly of what we preach to save those who believe. 22For Jews demand signs and Greeks seek wisdom, 23but we preach Christ crucified, a stumbling block to Jews and folly to Gentiles, 24but to those who are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. 25 For the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men. (1 Corinthians 1:20-25, ESV)

I am more convinced that only Jesus can make sense of the insensible. And I have made some peace with the fact that I will never fully understand all that takes place on this earth. As a matter of fact, I am growing to enjoy the fact that I don’t know everything and that everything doesn’t need to be explained to me.

The Unexpected Has Happened… Again | David Austin Balfour Remembered

In Memory of

David Austin Balfour

September 5, 1979 – January 11, 2012

I woke up this morning to the news that a classmate was no longer walking this earth. We were acquaintances in high school, but we interacted often enough to get to know each other.

As I read the news on the internet and on his Facebook page I had a memory flash into my mind of us sitting in Mrs. Griswell’s Senior English class. I was sitting near the back of the room, the second row from the door. He was sitting in the first row next to the door, the third chair from the front, facing the rest of the class, with his classic grin. If you knew David, you know which one I’m talking about. There wasn’t a care in the world to him. I wished then that I could know what that felt like.

This is the first memory that came to mind this morning.

It would be a lie to say that I don’t know why I am so bothered by the news of David’s death. He is gone. No more status updates on Facebook. No more class reunions to attend. David’s journey on this earth has come to an end. And I am bothered.

I am bothered because I wish the circumstances were different. I am bothered because there were things left unsaid for those that knew him most and best. I am bothered because I really don’t have anything to say that will change the reality of what happened last night. But, I think what bothers me most is that I was reminded, yet again, that there is no guarantee of tomorrow for any of us. I don’t think David was thinking yesterday that he would not be here today. I don’t think that it even crossed his mind that January 11, 2012 was going to be his last day on Earth.

The fact that life is so fragile, so unpredictable should make all of us carefully consider what we invest our time into. The unexpected has happened…again. Losing someone we know or love cannot be avoided. We would just rather not think about it. But, today we don’t have that luxury. Today we are faced with David’s death and our mortality. Today we can’t avoid dealing with the reality of death and the eventuality of our own demise.

Days like today are difficult. The following words have helped me understand how I should respond and deal with the reality of events like David’s death. I share them here, not as an explanation of why this happened. That would be foolish. I share them to let all of us know that we are not alone in our grief and pain. Our sadness and contemplation. I hope that they help to provide some perspective.

No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friend’s or of thine own were; any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee. [Source]

David, I hear the bell tolling.

Why Not Me?: Rethinking How and Why We Suffer | Part 3

When we don’t know what to do we do what feels right. The danger with this approach to life is that our feelings are never fully informed of all that is happening around us. So, when we rely on such an unreliable source of information we make decisions and entertain thoughts that are not congruent or consistent with God’s word and plan for us. Suffering, not pleasure, strengthens our faith. Suffering forces us to depend upon God to sustain us. Pleasure drives all of our attention and affections inward.

Why are we so surprised when we suffer?

I am not going to be looking at how the Bible, or the Christian faith for that matter, addresses the suffering of others. What I want to look at is what the Bible describes when it comes to the way that a Christian should suffer. Please understand that I understand suffering to be an expected reality as did many of the writers of the scriptures, including Jesus. I think that one of the more difficult thoughts that we have to overcome is that as Christians we can fall for the often told, or implied, lie that as Christians suffering will no longer be a part of our lives.  And if it is, it is because of some moral failure, some lesson that we have to learn, or that it is something that just happens and God is somehow going to make things all right. I think that when we frame suffering in this way we are left with a deficient theology of suffering and in many ways we undermine God’s character. Not only that, but all are terrible alternatives to a Christian’s response to or understanding of suffering.  I think that they are shallow, hurtful and inconsistent with the what the bible says. What makes matters more amazing is that we have not investigated deeply enough what God, Jesus, and the writers of the Old and New Testament have to teach us about suffering.

I have come to realize that many believer’s have a theology of suffering that is inconsistent with what the bible teaches. What this leads to is a self-centered view of suffering, avoidance of difficult circumstances and an unwillingness to be instruments of God’s glory regardless of what happens to us and in our lives.

Ridiculous Verses

The question becomes this: What does the bible say about how a Christian should suffer? I will not attempt to capture the whole of the scriptures witness on the issue of Christian suffering, but I would like to provide a representative sample so that we can begin to understand how Christian’s are supposed to accept, receive and understand suffering. And then, after entering into suffering how we should respond.

Joseph is standing in a position of power and his brothers, the ones that sold him into a life of misery are now standing before him. There would be no greater opportunity to exact his revenge. But that is not how Joseph sees the situation. Joseph has come to understand that God’s purpose for his life far different from what even his brothers could have known. Joseph looks at them and says, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people” (Genesis 50:20, NLT). How could Joseph had said this? Joseph had come to understand that the circumstances of his life were the necessary steps of God will and glory to be seen in the world. For some, this is a very difficult pill to swallow. I can understand and appreciate that.

18 “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. 19 If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. 20 Remember the word that I said to you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours. 21 But all these things they will do to you on account of my name, because they do not know him who sent me. (John 15:18-21, ESV)

If there is anyone in the scripture that understood what Jesus meant about the animosity that the world would have toward Christians it was Paul. I want to share a few passages that are just mind-blowing odd, not because of what he describes, but in the way that Paul thinks about the suffering that he is enduring.

3 More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. (Romans 5:3-5, ESV)

16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. 18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. (Romans 8:16-18, ESV)

Who talks like this? Seriously! How can you look at the suffering that you are enduring and not become bitter or hardened by it. Paul had become convinced of EVERY word that Jesus taught. There were no reservations. There was no doubt. There was nothing that could distract this apostle from the task that was laid before him. Peter in his first letter provides us with two helpful passages that put suffering for Christ in their proper context.

12 Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. 14 If you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. … 16 Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name. … 19 Therefore let those who suffer according to God’s will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good. (1 Peter 4:12-14, 16, 19, ESV)

9 Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. 10 And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. (1 Peter 5:9-10, ESV)

Suffering as a Christian is one of the marks and one of the evidences that we are pressing into the enemy’s territory. When we are satisfied with the way things are; when we are comfortable with the events that are taking place around us, we have not fully grasped the power and intensity of the Gospel. Why do I make such a statement? I say this for one simple reason, a reason that Paul himself offered up for his devotion and single-minded tenacity in spreading the message of Jesus: he believed that Good News was worthy of being spread to as many as would receive it.

3 For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers, my kinsmen according to the flesh. (Romans 9:3, ESV)

We have just hit the twilight zone of bible verses. I had read this verse so often and I had missed the full weight of what Paul was saying here. Paul is saying that when he looked at his countrymen, the Jews, his love for them was so strong that he was willing to forsake the single most precious thing that he had. To say it another way, Paul is saying that he would chose to endure the fires of hell and eternal torment “for the sake of” his countrymen! The longing of his heart; the depth of his love; the tenderness of his ministry was always for one thing, that others might come to know Jesus. If that meant being jailed, beaten, stoned, almost drown or chased out of town. The Gospel was such Good News to Paul’s soul and mind that anything and everything was worth enduring so that Jesus would be proclaimed.

Here are several other passages that continue to put suffering not in the category of a curse, but rather the blessed opportunity of every believer to make Jesus known.

7 But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. 8 Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ … 10 that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death… (Philippians 3:7-8, 10, ESV)

20 I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20, ESV)

8 Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, … 12 which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me. ( 2 Timothy 1:8, 12, ESV)

19 For this is a gracious thing, when, mindful of God, one endures sorrows while suffering unjustly. 20 For what credit is it if, when you sin and are beaten for it, you endure? But if when you do good and suffer for it you endure, this is a gracious thing in the sight of God. 21 For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps. 22 He committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. 23 When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. 24 He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. (James 2:19-24, ESV)

Opportunities Wasted

One of the thoughts that runs through my mind is wondering how many opportunities have I wasted, where I was faced with a difficult situation, and rather than turning to God to sustain me through it I blamed him for what I was dealing with. When we don’t know what to do we do what feels right. The danger with this approach to life is that our feelings are never fully informed of all that is happening around us. So, when we rely on such an unreliable source of information we make decisions and entertain thoughts that are not congruent or consistent with God’s word and plan for us.

Suffering, not pleasure, strengthens our faith. Suffering forces us to depend upon God to sustain us. Pleasure drives all of our attention and affections inward. When this happens we lose sight of almost everything around us. I guess the question becomes this: Why do we run from suffering so quickly? I am not advocating that we wallow in misery. What I am wondering is why don’t we see, or maybe we just can’t see, how God could use what is happening for his glory. The underlying assumption here is that God would allow this to happen. God will protect us from the world and its influences. I think that John’s words are a fitting end to this discussion. When we are convinced of this simple truth we will be driven to the Gospel, into the arms of our Savior, and we will no longer find our satisfaction in the small and dissipating pleasures this world offers.

13 Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. (1 John 3:13, ESV)

Additional Passages to Consider: 2 Corinthians 1:5-6; Galatians 6:17; Philippians 1:21, 29; Colossians 1:24; Hebrews 5:8; James 1:2-3; 1 Peter 3:14-17.

Why Not Me?: Rethinking How and Why We Suffer | Part 2

God does work things out for good, but not so that I can feel blessed. God works things out for good because He will not allow sin or human failure or demonic influence from deterring, detouring, diminishing or destroying His plan and purpose on the earth.

Under the Weight of It All

As I journey to better understand suffering I am confronted with an unusual and unexpected realization. I now see the way that suffering exposes, in ways that other circumstances do not, what beliefs and values I hold dear. Knowing that this is what happens during a time of crisis and pain gives me an opportunity to recognize that in the midst of all that is happening God is going to show Himself. Where seeing God’s hand becomes difficult is when you are so overwhelmed by what is happening that you simply are unable to make a distinction between what is happening and what God is doing to protect, guide and lead you.

Understanding the effect or effects that suffering has has provided me with some way of preparing for whatever comes. It is not a perfect preparation, but an emotional and spiritual work that I have taken more seriously in the past few months. What I have realized is that I do not like what has been exposed because it challenges what I read in the bible and what I have learned through experience. There is in an inconsistency that these circumstances expose that cause me to waver in my convictions about who God is and how He acts. This is not good, which is a mild understatement, I know.

I do not like feeling this conflicted. And, I don’t think that I am supposed to.  So, I am left with a choice.  Either change my conviction to conform to what I read in the bible. Or, change what I read in the bible so that it conforms to my convictions. If I could let you in on a little secret, this second option is a bad choice. Learning to conform and let go of convictions that are not in line with what the bible says is not easy or quick.  It can be (and has been) painful at times and it will take time to unlearn many (if not all) of the incorrect, inconsistent and incoherent things that we may have learned over the course of our lives and in church.

What suffering awakens in me when I am confronted with some of life’s more difficult issues cannot just be dismissed.  There are so many “answers” for why suffering exists. And many of them are NOT emotionally, psychologically or even theologically satisfying. So, it has become important to look at several questions that have come up for me like: What is the correct response to suffering? Can I even talk in this way? What do I do when there are no simple, or even just coherent answers to what I see happening around us?

It is this process of looking, thinking and even feeling my way through these experiences that should be entered into with out whole person if there is going to be any hope of understanding and accepting suffering in my life.

Suffering never feels like a “minor” thing. And it never should. We have to work diligently to feel the full weight of what we are talking about so that we can have an honest conversation (many times just with ourselves).  And more to the point, until we are under the weight of suffering it is difficult to make an accurate evaluation of what we are talking about and the conclusions that we arrive at. So, rather than going over any of the potential answers that are given to suffering I want to look at some of the underlying assumptions from which some of these questions and answers come.

Is There Meaning In My Suffering?

The search for some sort of meaning in the middle of suffering has been the approach that many have taken. “Surely, there has to be some reason for this?” we ask ourselves. I understand that this is an important question, but it should not be at the top of the list. Suffering and its cousin, Evil, have a way of revealing the flaws in the armor of faith. We always seem to find ourselves trying to scrape together a coherent answer to what has happened. And, to be honest, right when something happens is not the right time to try and put two intelligible words together. Those responding to the suffering and those in the midst of it should not try to “see the good” in that moment.  There will be time later, but not then. Many times all those kind thoughts only seem to add insult to injury and salt to an open and deep wound. I think that we have a lot to learn from Jesus’ response to the death of Lazarus.  That famously short verse in John informs us as to how we should respond. It simply reads, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35).

The sheer wisdom of this is astounding. Jesus did not rush in to fix the problem even though he was going to. Jesus did not come sooner and take care of the problem as Mary and Martha wanted. Jesus waited four days, allowed Lazarus to die and then when he shows up he joins in the mourning. Jesus was not surprised by the death. He had predicted it. So Jesus’ weeping was not about surprise or guilt. Jesus wept because he saw and responded to the pain of loved ones who had lost a brother. Jesus knew what he was about to do, but he took the time to enter into the hurt of Lazarus’ family.

Only those that are willing to enter into the suffering of others are able to respond in this way. But, most of us do not do it. We just find ourselves offering these spiritually sounding platitudes that make us feel better or because we do not know what else to do. “He is better off with God.” “God needed another angel in heaven.” “Heaven is a better place because he is there.” When my brother-in-law died this past year I nearly came unhinged when I started hearing these statement. A reaction to what was happening that I was very surprised at!

I was not interested in good-intentioned phrases. I almost punched a lady because of what she was saying to my mother-in-law! (She was just too far for me to reach her.) I just wanted someone to cry with me. I just needed someone to know what I was feeling. Since that day I have not tried to say anything when I have encountered death. There is nothing to say. There is only love to see. I now know why Jesus wept. Death robs us of hope. And it is only in the comfort of the consoling that we remember that there is so much more to life. And, when this mourning happens among the redeemed of God this is a mourning that is different from that of the world (2 Thessalonians 4:13).

I have come to believe that my suffering has meaning only within the context of a relationship with Jesus. Because of Jesus I have a way of looking at and dealing with suffering that is different that what the world provides.

Does God Really Work All Things For Good?

I have long believed that suffering and evil are the greatest enemies to faith because they stand in our faces challenging us to question not so much the goodness of God, but rather God’s power. How could an all-powerful God allow this to happen? Because we “know” that an all good God would never allow some of the things that we are seeing if He had the ability to prevent it? Do you see what we have just done when we ask a question like this.  We have assumed something about what we know that God knows. Or, if I were to say it another way, I am assuming that if I had all the information that God has, I would make a different (think “better” here) choice in the situation.

We have to be very careful with this kind of thinking. We have to guard against the impulse to second guess God’s abilities AND motives. At the root of this is a subtle implication that we are more noble, gracious and caring than God himself. Because if this is not what we are getting at then we would not say what we say!  We have to take a hard look at what is the root of this thought.

Many of us have heard that God works all things out for good. But, I have a question.  How do we know that? And what do we mean when we say that? This second question really gets to the heart of the issue. Too often we assume that the “good” referred to is the good of the one that is hurting. But, there is something wrong with the idea that God is tending to every persons sufferings in this selfish a way. When God is this attentive to us, WE become the most important thing on God’s mind.  Which is not just untrue, it makes God an idolater! The most important thing to God is God.

It is very easy for us to focus on the that part of the verse where God is working all things out for good. But what is the reason that Paul says that there is a working by God for good? It is ultimately to accomplish God’s purpose (which is the reason that Paul provides). Our good is a secondary issue. Our good happens because we are found in the will of God which is good. When we align our lives and wills to that of God’s we become the beneficiaries of untold and incalculable blessings. Which, not incidentally, Paul points out as he closes Romans 8 from verses 29-39.

God does work things out for good, but not so that I can feel blessed. God works things out for good because He will not allow sin or human failure or demonic influence from deterring, detouring, diminishing or destroying His plan and purpose on the earth.

Our union with Christ is what makes the “good” make sense. When we lose sight of this we try to help by sharing a “promise from the Lord” only to undermine the very thing we are trying to do. Bad theology has continued the suffering of many because it does not heal the hurt that exists.  If we do not get our theology straight we impugn the character of God, not so much because we want to, but because we are not left with another alternative. We are dazed and confused and because we don’t have a clear reference point we are set adrift on the sea of emotions.

I am thankful to Dr. John Piper of DesiringGod.org for the following questions (which I think I have stated correctly here): Do we make much of God because he makes much of us? Or do we make much of God because he frees us to make much of Him?

At the bottom of the first question is me.  At the bottom of the second is God. If God’s motivation for action is to please me, God becomes dependent upon human activity. But if God’s motivation for action is to do His own good pleasure, then we, the creatures, will receive and experience the full measure of God’s blessings. This is why we have to be very careful when we are making statements like the one under discussion because we can create a situation where God becomes the servant.

When we consider suffering by looking at what is at the bottom of our theology we are better prepared to respond to the circumstances that will most certainly come.

Next Time: In Part 3 we will look at what the bible reveals to us about the Christian’s response to and in suffering.

Why Not Me?: Rethinking How and Why We Suffer | Part 1

As I read the bible I find that there is a given assumption that suffering will be, and to a greater extent than is understood, should be an expected part of what I encounter as a Christian.

Reading Time: This post will take about 20-25 minutes to read.

This post is directed toward anyone that claims the Christian faith. If you are not a Christian or do not have religious leanings I hope that you might still be able to find the content helpful.

Learning How to Suffer: An Under-Attended Class

In the last several months I have had several reasons to do some thinking on the topic (and reality) of suffering. The reason for my writing began with the opportunities that these events have provided for me to do some thinking and rethinking of what I believe regarding this subject. What I am not trying to do in this and future posts is to make too much of the personal questions like, “Why is this happening to me?” or other questions that look at suffering as a force acting on me. I think that this kind of effort can be and is beneficial, but I wanted to take this a step further.

What I have been wondering about is what the bible has to say to me about my response to suffering.  Does the bible have anything to teach me, in a practical way, about how I am supposed to respond when a tragedy hits my life directly (i.e., the death of a loved one)! And if there is something in the bible that helps me to better live in and live through suffering, what can I do to begin to do that so that I might better reflect the bible’s example and direction. And, also related, to experience some of what I read in the life of the apostles and the early church.

As I read the bible I find that there is a given assumption that suffering will be, and to a greater extent than is understood, should be an expected part of what I encounter as a Christian. Suffering should be expected as the rule and not the exception of the Christian experience (I will explain further in the next section). Just because society has “advanced” according to some standards and measures, the offense of the Gospel to the self-righteousness found in the world (and still many times in my own heart) has not changed. I think that we make a grave mistake in thinking that the world has grown in its desire for the things of God. I know that this may sound crazy to some. I am okay with that.

What I am thinking as I write these thoughts down is to try and investigate what the bible has to say about how I should experience and perceive suffering within my own heart and mind. Another thought, and possibly more importantly, what impression are those who do not hold my faith in Jesus left with, about my faith, when they see me dealing with tragedy and suffering?

Essentially there are two short questions here.  They are:

  • How should a Christian suffer?
  • What will the world learn about Jesus when we suffer as Christians?

Suffering’s Two Tributaries Into My Life

I believe that suffering will come in two general ways to a believer. The first is that suffering will come because we are living in a world that as been contaminated and polluted by Sin. This means that there are events and circumstances that we cannot avoid just because we are now redeemed by Jesus’ work on the cross. I am not just saying that “stuff happens.” I am saying that we should not be surprised when it does. The blood of Christ is not a magic potion that makes us immune to the suffering of this world.  The blood of Christ provides us a way through that suffering that will, or should, reveal the full measure of the Gospel in us to those who see us. (Here are a sampling of Paul’s own words as he discussed the issue of suffering in his own life: Romans 5:3, Romans 8:18, 2 Corinthians 1:5-7, Colossians 1:24, Philippians 1:29, Philippians 3:7-10, 2 Timothy 1:8, 12, 2 Timothy 2:3-4, 2 Timothy 2:8-10).

Connected to the presence of Sin in the world, I have in mind that even the Christian will have to deal with the consequences of their personal sins. Christ has taken away the penalty of sin, but in the same way that every action has a reaction, every sin has a consequence. These cannot be avoided and so we should not be surprised when we suffer for them. Peter tells us as much in his letter (1 Peter 2:20a). This suffering is justified and while God can use it God does want us to make a practice of sinning (1 John 3:7ff). This it is not what I am referring to when I talk about suffering. (Just want to clarify.)

The second way that we will suffer is due to our profession and demonstration of faith. [Aside: I am growing in my curiosity about whether or not an increase of suffering in our lives of this second variety is an indicator of our devotion to Christ.  I will have to look at this further, but I am going to go on a limb and say, “Yes,” in response.] As we become convinced that Christ is who He said He was and that the life that he purchased for us is not speculation or wishful thinking, it will become natural for us to grow in our desire to conform our life to His. It is in this process of maturity that we will have our eyes opened to the inconsistencies that exist between our life in Christ and what this world has to offer.  John does not pull any punches when he says the following:

15 Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. 17 And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever. (1 John 2:15-17, emphasis added, ESV)

It is the love of the world that creates in us the double-mindedness that James warns about (James 1:8). We have been born again, born from above, recreated, given a new nature, a new purpose, a new will, a new citizenship in a new city.  We have a new king, a new family, a new language, new gifts and new clothes.  Why are we so infatuated with things that will fail, places that will fade and people that will falter?  Why do we find ourselves so willing to pawn the treasures of God for the cheap souvenirs of a place that we will forget faster than our last breath? I just do not understand this anymore.

Growing Restless With The Way Things Are

I find myself growing more and more restless.  Not so much with the people outside of the church. They are doing what they are supposed to do.  I grow frustrated with the people who claim Christ as their treasure.  But even more than frustration, I grow increasingly fearful.  Fearful of the lack of devotion to Christ.  Not just commitment.  There are a lot of folks committed to Jesus (as long as the dividend is high enough).  But then “it” hits the fan and the fade begins. Look again at the attitude that Peter demonstrates in John 6 when Jesus starts talking about cannibalism (Jesus’ teaching about drinking His blood and eating His body).

66 After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him. 67 So Jesus said to the Twelve, “Do you want to go away as well?” 68 Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, 69 and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.” (emphasis added, ESV)

Oh God, that my resolve to follow you be converted into an unquenchable devotion to Your Son! “To whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life!” This is not just poetic language.  This is not brown-nosing. This is not an attempt at piety. This is the confession of a man that has truly “believed, and [has] come to know, that [Jesus is] the Holy One of God.” I am convicted of this almost everyday.

The Bottom Line: I Lost My Passport

So what is the bottom line? I think that we have not been assimilated to our new home in way that makes us long for it more than what we see around us. If it is true what Paul said that what is spiritual is more real than what we can see with our eyes, we have a long way to go when we long to keep what we have here over what God has for us (2 Corinthians 4:18)! Here is a question that I have been asking myself lately: Would I rather live life here on this earth? Or, do I want to be where Jesus is?

Anybody, especially any Christian, who thinks that this sounds morbid, to overly dramatic or even like a death wish has not, I believe, fully considered what God has given to us. I am a professional Christian, and I am only now coming to appreciate what the Gospel is offering to me, a lost and wretched sinner. I am sure that we can argue back and forth on this point, but I think that this question is at the very heart of why God has not completely eradicated suffering and evil. He does not want us to grow so accustomed to this world that we lose sight of what Jesus went to prepare for us in heaven. Remember, we should not love the things of this world (1 John 2:15-17).

A Sinful Silence on Sin

So where does this leave us? Why have we not kept our passports current? I think that is has something to do with a failure to feel the weight of Sin’s effect in our lives and in the lives of those around us. This world does not like for sin to be talked about and exposed. While this may appear obvious, the church has become remarkably silent on the subject. How many sermons in a given year directly and pointedly tackle THE GREATEST hindrance to having a relationship with God? We want to help people rather than heal them.  We want to furnish our buildings rather than finish Christ’s work. We want to share our opinions rather than the Word of God. We want to placate the religious rather than to please the Father.  Our priorities are so messed up we have grown doubtful that it will ever change. So what do we do? We start new churches that will get it right.

Please understand, I think we need more churches! As many as we can start as soon as we can start them. The concern that I have is that we may start churches that will duplicate and repeat the very thing that is not working – majoring on the minors of what it means to be a church. The church must return to the only mission for which she was created, to make disciples. (I will pick up this subject on another day!) Let’s back to the subject at hand.

Implications Precede Applications

It is now my conviction that the root of complacency in the early years of my faith was my failure to dig deeper and deeper into the implications of the bible. This led to laziness in my faith expression. The implications of the Bible must necessarily precede any applications that I might attempt to make. One example is God’s admonition for us to be holy as He is holy. While it might be easy to look at the first part of that phrase and make it the primary focus because it is about what I have to do, I would be wrong. That first part may be what I want to find out, but if I start there before I know the second I have put the proverbial cart before the horse.

But why is this a mistake? It is a mistake because the more important aspect of that statement is that God is HOLY. What exactly am I trying to be or become if I am supposed to imitate God in holiness? If I don’t have the clearest understanding of what God’s holiness is and demands I will be satisfied with whatever makes me feel better or just makes sense to me. The implication of God’s holiness will have a direct and radical effect on how I try to do what the command implies.

Let me press into this a little more. Follow me here.

  1. God is Holy
  2. God’s holiness requires holiness in everything else
  3. Any failure for holiness requires punishment
  4. Adam sinned and put the whole of creation under the curse of Sin
  5. Any effort to “make it up to God” fails and I am left without escape
  6. Only a holy person can stand in the place of the accused (but that person does not exist)
  7. So, God comes in the person of Jesus Christ
  8. Jesus fulfills the law I could not
  9. Jesus receives the judgment of God for Sin
  10. Faith in 1 – 9 gives God the right to count me righteous
  11. Anybody that does not believe is still under judgment
  12. And that judgment is eternal separation from God

Now this is just the implication!

The application of this is that we must live in a way that accords to this implication. Behavior will follow belief.  I can not behave my way to a new belief.  I have believe my way to a new behavior. This is not an act of the will, but a change in our affections.  In other words, when I dig deep, what is the motivation that is driving me? Until I am able to articulate that motivation I will make decisions based in something that I am not as aware of as I need to be, or at least could be.

This is why the Gospel ought to become the most loved and cherished information and message that we have ever heard, and ever share! It is the Gospel that provides the greatest motivation for living because if we can apply what the Gospel implies we will keep our focus on what God is focused on.

Next time: We will look at the issue of suffering within the context of God’s will and God’s word.

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